Thought I Would Be Home Earlier Chicken

Ingredients:

Three thawed boneless breasts
8 oz sliced mushrooms
As many pearl onions as one can peel while chicken browns 16?
3/4 cup Riesling wine
3/4 cup (half of container too lazy to measure) creme fraiche
Desperate healthy dash of garlic powder when one discovers
that the many cloves from Sam's have gone bad
Healthy pinch of Penzey's Basil at last minute because one is
worried about lack of spices

Season chicken with coarse ground pepper and sea salt which
you are so excited to have bought in Paris.

Heat oil in frying pan until it shimmers like Bridget on America's
Test Kitchen recommends.

Brown breasts in what would look like one tablespoon of oil on
Food Network, for 7 minutes on each side.

While breasts are browning, busily try to peel those rascally little
onions, while cursing Econofoods for not having fresher produce.

Remove chicken to plate.

Add another tablespoon of oil because pan does not look especially juicy.

Toss in box of mushrooms, wishing you had bought the morels
on Rue Cler, wondering if the customs dog would have pounced on me.

Toss in a lot less pearl onions than one thought one would have peeled by now.

Flip and stir, waiting for mushroom liquid.

Give up after a few minutes and pour in 3/4 cup of wine.

Remind husband who cannot drink (type 2 diabetes meds) that alcohol burns off.

Add what might appear to be 3/4 cup creme fraiche.

Stir.

Put chicken on top of mushroom mixture and let simmer covered for eight minutes
while Entertainment Tonight finishes.

Remove one naked breast (!!) for finicky son.

Plate other two in salad bowls, trying to evenly divide sauce and pour on top.

Lick plate, realizing I return to Paris in two days.